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I came very close to telling Jake the truth about Santa tonight. Earlier he had asked me point blank if I was the one who put the presents under the tree on Christmas, and since Fiona (who is six and still very much a believer) was in the room I said “Of course not!” But later, after Fiona had gone to bed, I asked him if he wanted to talk about it. He said that I had been asking questions about his letter to Santa (I had; I was explaining that Santa was not going to bring him a Fushigi, because Santa had looked up the reviews on Amazon, and learned that it’s not actually a magic ball, that it’s for much older kids, and that it takes 30 hours of practice to do even the easiest tricks, and Santa doesn’t like to risk his reputation with As-Seen-On-TV crap), and that made him think that I was buying the gifts.
I looked at him good and hard, and asked him who he really thought brought the presents and put them under the tree. He said he thought it was Santa.
I asked him who he wanted it to be.
His eyes teared up and he whispered “Santa.”
He’s nine. It’s getting a little ridiculous that he still believes. I mean, it’s sweet, but it worries me a little. This is a kid who walks to school alone and wants a cell phone and has been known to say the F word to me on occasion. It’s just weird that he’s still holding on to the idea that a fat man in a red suit climbs down chimneys and leave presents under the tree without setting off the motion detectors.
The thing is, I don’t think his near-tears have anything to do with being a child or believing in magic. I think he’s really afraid that if he tells me he doesn’t believe, he doesn’t get to ask for presents. But I can take all of next year to break the news to him, and reassure him that he still gets gifts. And, as a bonus, he gets to be my special helper keeping the magic going for his sister. I think he’ll like that.
Originally posted on Selfish Mom. All opinions expressed on this website come straight from Amy unless otherwise noted. Please visit Amy’s Full Disclosure page for more information. Amy also blogs at Filming In Brooklyn, Behind the Screen, Momtourage, and podcasts with The Blogging Angels.